Answering the Proust Questionnaire, 2016

Because I’m lazy and don’t respect buzzfeed, but respect being idle even more-so.

On Tue, 25 Oct 16 05:39:08 UTC Brandon Nobles (31) answered the Proust Questionnaire (click on a question to read other answers):

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?: The inability to see the end of present troubles, to lose someone, to be miserable as to think one deserving of it
Where would you like to live?: Somewhere quiet, by water, or Venice
What is your idea of earthly happiness?: Satisfaction with what you have and contented to wait for what you want
To what faults do you feel most indulgent?: To think highly of myself when I do the bare minimum to earn it, or to feel the need to earn and attain validation or approval
Who are your favorite heroes of fiction?: Antigone, hero of Sophocles play (the one without the mother fucker Oedipus), Alyosha Karamazov (Brothers Karamazov)
Who are your favorite characters in history?: A mixture of Epicurus, Catherine the Great, Vermeer, Virginia Woolf, Marcel Proust, Caesar Augustus, Sun Tsu, Spinoza, Hypatia, Niels Bohr, Richard Feynmann,
Who are your favorite heroines in real life? JK Rowling, Valentina Lisitsa,
Who are your favorite heroines of fiction?: Explicitly: Albertine (In Search of Lost Time), Madame Bovary (Flaubert’s novel of the same name), Brienne of Tarth, Arya Stark/No One, Daenerys Stormbornof House Targeryen, First of her name, Mother of Dragons, Breaker of Chains, Queen of the Rhoynar and the Andals and the First Men, and Protector of the Realm. (etc)
Your favorite painter?: Vermeer or Rembrandt. I shall not choose.
Your favorite musician?: Beethoven
The quality you most admire in a man?: kindness, honesty, intelligence
The quality you most admire in a woman?: kindness, honesty, intelligence
Your favorite virtue?: Patience, for it is the one that is unattainable by more hard work
Your favorite occupation?: Reading of great destruction and war, writing about peace, attempting to live peacefully by lessons learned from war.
Who would you have liked to be?: A pacifist Emperor, to have all the strength on Earth, to have never used it
Your most marked characteristic?: effort, attempting to pass off months of light-work as the concentration of smaller time frames to give the impression of more effort, itself an effort, over-explaining apparent shit.
What do you most value in your friends?: trust when I don’t deserve it; love when I don’t want it; understanding when I am unintelligible
What is your principle defect?: Accepting the fact that one has defects on one hand an omnipotent creator on the other hand who acknowledges no blame in this imperfection
What to your mind would be the greatest of misfortunes?: Never to have known my mother, father, brothers, or sisters.
What would you like to be?: Myself, as I would want those I love to see me
What is your favorite color?: if to select by the suggestion of a color’s character, red, otherwise a color is defined as pleasing by its harmony or disharmony with others, in concert alone do they achieve their great effects
What is your favorite flower?: All, any
What is your favorite bird?: the white cockatoo, or blue macaw. A blue macaw once called me a fuck. True story. I admired her courage.
Who are your favorite prose writers?: Robert Graves, Marcel Proust, Virginia Woolf, Issac Asimov, George R. R. Martin, Arthur C. Clarke, JK Rowling, Helen Rappaport, Simon Schama
Who are your favorite poets?: Oscar Wilde, Omar Khayyam (as translated by Edward Fitzgerald in The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam), Ed Al Poe, W.B. Yeats, Chateaubriand, Maya Angelou, Sylvia Plath
Who are your heroes in real life?: My mother, my brothers, hundreds of writers, artists, comedians, people that are just great that I know, professors, teachers, educators, actors, playwrights, satirists, friends, people who loan me money on faith without interest.
Who are your favorite heroines of history?: Elizabeth I (of England), Elizabeth I (of Russia), Catherine the Great, Big Head Yang, legendary Chinese pirate who controlled the rivers of Nanjing during the 19th century
What are your favorite names?: Julian Bashir, Robert, or Edgar, or Roger, Khalil, Khan Noonien Soong, Brent, Mycroft, Irene, Josephine, Vincent, Marcus, Bethanya, Katerina.
What is it you most dislike?: Being defective, having things that deserve distaste
What historical figures do you most despise?: Adol Fitler, Yosef Steel, Pol Pot; Hong Xiuquan (Jesus’ little brother, it’s this whole thing…) Konstantine I (AKA, Herald of the Dark Ages and the founding member of the band that would later play reunion tours in Spain, Judea, Egypt, and the many cover bands that have risen, most notably in modern times Osama Bin-Laden with varying degrees of cult-success following their military gains.
Speaking of: Ayatollah Khomeini, Felix Dzerzhinsky, Bolshevik assassin, Andrew Jackson, Christopher Columbus, Herman Cortes, Torquemada, and a veritable buffet of unworthy Tartars, the assassin of Chancellor Galron ON A DIPLOMATIC MISSION IN THE WAKE OF THE DESTRUCTION OF THE KLINGON MOON. MURDERERS! Luckily Spock was able to bring truth to this before the assassination of the Federation President; people ignorant of actual history; Historians who disfigure the truth to beautify themselves or the criminals who support them, see: This list is actually too long for me, but you can check the author of Henry Kissinger’s biography)
What event in military history do you most admire?: Hannibal’s victory at Cannae, the Liberation of Vichy France, Napoleon at Austerlitz, the forces of Caesar Augustus defeating Marc Antony at Actium
What natural gift would you most like to possess?: the ability to bear with ease what I struggle to deal with now
How would you like to die?: A better man than I am
What is your present state of mind?: Work everyday without excuse, do not sleep without earning respite, and no excuse is necessary: progress in everything at all cost, physical, emotional, and psychological.
What is your motto?: “Don’t make the statue until the battle’s won.”

In anticipating an upcoming publication, I was asked to provide a biography, but being too shameful for an honest one and too lazy for a forgery, I decided to fill out a questionnaire, so I that I would, at least, earn my reputation, poor or otherwise, or just be another quickly quickly forgotten internet writer whom, as you may remember, probably said stuff, of that you can be certain, my friends. I chose one I knew by reputation of the author whose name has become attached to a question given to the young writer Marcel Proust.